something weird

[ireallylovecats]

im a straight girl and i feel very horny thinking about guys bulges and sucking dick, but when i actually see a picture of a naked penis i get kinda grossed out and think its ugly. i read somewhere that arousal turns off the part of the brain that processes disgust so maybe thats why? i don’t know i just feel kind of conflicted and like my sexuality is fake/invalid lol.

[mikky]

Hey there!

I think it's pretty normal to feel differently about the idea of a body part in a sexual context/the idea of a sex act and then something removed from context, like a picture of a naked penis. For some folks, that might be attractive or alluring, but for a lot of folks, it's the context around nudity that feels interesting, if that makes sense. I am about to respond to your other post, and I know that the idea of having sex is really exciting to you. I want to remind you that you never have to interact sexually with any body parts in any specific ways that you don't want to.

Why do you think this would make your sexuality fake or invalid?

[ireallylovecats]

i just feel like maybe once i’m about to do it i won’t want to and it’s almost like my identity will be shifted and it won’t feel as good or be as exciting.

[amber]

Hi ireallylovecats !

I want to echo what mikky said about feeling that disconnect between sexual acts/fantasy and just seeing a body part. I also think it is super common for folks to feel nervous or intimated when thinking about the logistics of sex vs the fantasy. That is why trust with a partner (and yourself) is so necessary!

I am also hearing you worry a bit about feeling 'let down' or disappointed after having sex/the fantasy not living up to the hype of your desires. Does that sound accurate?

It might be true that you experience a new sexual activity and do not feel the way you thought you might when imagining it. Not only is that normal, but it can be exciting to try new things learn about your sexuality. How does hearing that make you feel?

[amber]

I also wanted to add that it is again common for pictures of genitals on people we do not know to not make us feel the same way we feel about seeing the body of someone we are with. Sexually explicit content is created with the intention of sexual interest/arousal where as people, and their bodies, are obviously much more than that.

[ireallylovecats]

yeah i think that’s it, that makes sense. i’d probably feel different with a real life person/encounter.

[Andy]

I’m glad it makes sense and that talking here has been helpful!

Feel free to circle back if any new questions or worries come up.