Scarleteen

So I have started using a shower head for masturbation when I was around 15.
Back then it felt good but at some point I had to use a stronger flow for it to work.
I used to masturbate for long periods of time but never climaxed. Eventually after every session my clitoris would get twice the size and I wouldn’t feel any pleasure anymore.
When I was even younger I would rub my vagina against a pillow and it would feel amazing. Now I can’t feel anything.
Is it possible I damaged my clit? Is it ok for it to become twice it’s size? How can I masturbate properly?

Hey BarR, welcome to the boards!

Before I answer your questions, to get a clearer idea of what you’re experiencing, I’d like to ask: when you say that now you can’t feel anything, do you mean specifically if you masturbate with a pillow, or if you masturbate in general?

I’ll answer your third question first: There’s no one “proper” way to masturbate. As long as you’re doing what feels good and comfortable for you and stopping if anything is uncomfortable or painful, you’re on the right track. We have an article on the site that has lots of information about how to masturbate, including examples of some ways people with vulvas do it (near the beginning of the article). Here it is: https://www.scarleteen.com/read/sex-sex ... masturbate

As for your first and second questions, masturbating using a shower head or by rubbing against a pillow aren’t likely to have caused any damage to your clitoris, even if you’ve increased the pressure you apply using the shower head or haven’t climaxed. It’s also absolutely okay for your clitoris to become twice its size during masturbation (and be larger and more noticeable afterwards). The clitoris is attached to ligaments, muscles and veins that become filled with blood during arousal (like while being turned on during masturbation, in this case) and that blood flow can lead to the glans (the tip of the clitoris) temporarily becoming larger. (Here’s an article that includes information about the clitoris, including what I’ve just described: https://www.scarleteen.com/read/bodies/ ... s-and-more).

Not feeling pleasure after a certain point when masturbating is also common. Arousal and pleasure can vary and they aren’t always predictable, but that doesn’t mean anything is wrong, it’s just bodies doing what they do.

How do you feel about all this? Does it help with any of the uncertainty about what you’re experiencing?

First of all thank you very much for answering me.
When I say I can’t feel anything I mean not only with a pillow.
I think you helped me with my uncertainties and I am very grateful that.

Hi BarR!

I’m so glad to hear that Aliah’s advice helped with some uncertainties surrounding masturbation. If you have more questions or concerns about this, or a different topic, we are here to help!