Scarleteen

Many articles on safer sex on here reference a six-month guideline. This is the practice of correctly and consistently using barriers for all kinds of sexual activity in which someone's genitals are involved for about six months, during the course of which all parties have received a full STI screening once in the beginning and once at the end and maintain an exclusive sexual relationship.

Now, this makes a lot of sense to me in the context of when one or more parties have been sexually active in the past. However, this guideline, at least in the safer sex how-to https://www.scarleteen.com/read/sexual- ... er-sex-how, is not presented within that context, but introduced "from above", as though applicable to all contexts (sexual relationships) in the same way.

My question is, is this necessary if neither partner has ever been sexually active? I know you can get certain "S"TIs from non-sexual contact (like the kind of HPV which causes plantar warts), so the risk is not zero, but people do not magically get STIs, they get them from other people (who got them from other people, and so on). I cannot give someone an infection which is transmitted via sexual contact with another person, if I have never had sexual contact with another person (and also never shared a needle).

If my understanding is correct, then I do not see any purpose in waiting for two unnecessary (?) rounds of STI panels in six months before making the collective decision to use or not to use barriers for certain activities (specifically oral and manual sex). But, even then, it would not be immediate STI prevention that would be a contributing factor, but comfort and having the familiarity and knowledge for future STI prevention. My partner and I would use barriers for the sake of experimenting with what is comfortable, what we like, and learning how to use them.

I want to be informed of what we can gain from using or trying barriers for certain activities, but, if there is nothing to be gained from STI panels and the necessary wait time, then I don't see why it would be needed to wait for that, should we make the decision that we prefer to not use them for certain activities, or try them and decide we don't want to, or not all the time.

Am I understanding this correctly? Thank you.

Hey there, ratherslowseal. You are understanding this correctly, presuming you are absolutely certain your partner hasn't had any previous sexual partners for any kind of sex. That's often the rub, because sometimes people aren't honest with each other, or aren't understanding what kinds of contact we mean when we say sexual contact (as in, not just penis-in-vagina intercourse).

Too, it's also vital that partners not using barriers are also not engaging in or going to engage in sex of any kind with other partners: when people are young and new to each other and sexual relationships, it's also not uncommon for people to have sex outside one relationship.

But if you and your partner are exclusive and will stay exclusive, and haven't been sexual with other people before, then yes, you can rest assured you're both likely very low to no risk when it comes to most STIs (oral herpes would be the big exception here, since that's usually acquired non-sexually in childhood).

Thank you so much for the reassurance and context! (And also your response on my last post, I was very appreciative of that as well) I will be sure to bring this into my partner and I's ongoing discussion about it.

You’re welcome. So glad this relationship is going so well for you!