Scarleteen

So, for the most parts of my life I've identified as a woman. I had phases where I identified as a demigirl, or as ftm trans (never came out, the phase ended before I had the chance to), or genderfluid, apagender, etc.... But being a cis woman still resonates with me the most, despite my gender expression being very fluid.
But lately, I've starting to question again, because of one weird dream.
This is kinda tmi now, sry.
So, in my dream I was kind of having a picknick with a bunch of women, and we were all naked. I don't know how I knew they were women, because they all had mixed or mostly male genitalia. And I was just a part of that group, so I had both too.
And just generally I noticed about myself that I really want my body to look more masculine, while still dressing feminine and identifying as a woman.
One time I also just took a mirror and kind of looked down there, and I automatically started looking for signs that I was growing a penis or something. Idk.
This honestly feels so embarassing to type out, and I hope it's not too explicit, but I just really want to know if this is a common experience or have some advice ig.

Hi shark_hyazinthe.

While this is not an experience I've myself had, it's not something to be embarrassed about. There's two parts to this - first, there's the doubts of being intersex, but there's also a questioning of gender which I think could be what's underlying this dream. There's nothing wrong with that and it's quite common for people to explore their feelings about their body, their assigned sex at birth vs their gender, gender expression, etc. I don't think the dream is necessarily a sign of anything specific beyond that.

How can we support you? Do you want to talk more about gender exploration, or did you just want to see if any other users have similar stories?