How to tell a friend I don't reciprocate his feelings?

[trunky]

Heyyy,
so this is basically just a rant I send to a Frenchie I met on Discord like a month ago.
They're queer as well, a trans dood to be exact, however, since they're 29 years of age they didn't feel comfortable talking to me about stuff really, and instead told me about resources I could consort and specifically mentioned Scarleteen. For context, this happened on Halloween and I wrote to them that night.
Here it goes:
"soooo
I've kinda got like a story time...
alsooo
I turned 15 like 4 days ago or something, so I should be like different in my headspace and all, or something...
Anyhow, let me just quickly introduce all peeps involved:
M, 14, my best friend, muslim, and a chill dood all things considered
C, 15, that friend I told you about sometime ago, who I'm really good with
went to a concert together on Wednesday
was very nice
doesn't have anything to do with the story thooo, lol
So, they are gonna get involved later
Then there is T thooo
14, and that dood that's pretty racist and kinda fascist in his rethoric
I went to his place yesterday cuz of Halloween
and since I didn't have anything better to do, + I went to his place like the previous two years with other folks as well
This year, however, we were the only ones
His family of like 15-20 peeps, like 10 of them kids from like 6-12 were there as well thoo
Sooo, I got to his place kinda late
well, like quarter to 6
but it started at 4:30, that's why I was kinda late
So I just ate a lil bit
And then we basically went trick or treating already
Not like the both of us really went; we got three whole candies, which were like cheap stale ones as well
basically just went with his family, cause, might as well
Just chatted a bit
Now, dood's a Mormon as well, not having been baptized tho, cuz his parents don't really want him to and say, he's only allowed to do it by the time he turns 18, hoping he won't go through with it
I'm kinda indifferent, cuz I view all organized religion as inherently bad and immoral, especially considering the Mormons' image of a bunch of different groups of peeps, but alas
The issue came up
I said like; "Well, I feel like, if it weren't for your religion, you wouldn't completely cross out the idea of engaging in homosexual acts"
foreshadowing...
And he replied; "No, that's true. I mean like, I couldn't imagine having a husband, but I'd like to try it at least."
I basically went on how that's toxic thinking
Anyhow, a bit later I said, in English, cuz why not
"If "god" made homosexuality a sin, why did he make boys so cute?"
to like look what he had to say
He said something like " Well, you're not one of them" (the cute ones)
I replied, sarcasticly; "Yeah, Idk, thanks ig"
He then said something about how it's still a sin, and the fact I like boys makes me be possesed by Satan, whom he whole-heartedly believes in
"Well, if I am possesed by Satan and on the "wrong" side, how come I am doing so good in live, by every meassure, including mental health-wise?", I asked
He announced, I will loose everything I've got rn one day
Yeahhh
I thought of that to be very weird
That wasn't the only stuff we talked about, but the stuff important to the story
Right now, I should probably reiterate, how he has, on multiple occasions sexually/verbally harrassed me
What comes to mind would be, how, when we were in some large city together, when we were alone in public, but no people being around, in some Japanese park, one build up by the Jap-Ger community, he grabbed my ass
I just said something like " Wtf, do not do anything like that ever again"
And like a few weeks earlier, after PE, when we and two friends were alone in the changing room for doods, when I changed pants, he said " That's quite the nice ass"
And I was like "Wtffff, I do not want to hear something like that from you, that's actually verbal harrasment, dood"
Soooooooooooooo
We were in his room after getting back from trick or treating
And talked about that concert I went to with C on Wednesday
He thinks I want a romantic relationship with her, even tho I've told him multiple times, I was very happy with the platonic one we got rn and how I adore to be able to talk to her about everything concerning me in life, and how that's also the case vise-versa
Btw, the concert was greatttttt and we talked a bunch beforehand and afterwards
To get back on track,
He started to take off my socks and tickled my feet, which I found to be realll weird, but he gave me a foot massage, so I didn't mind
When I once told him I did some not-really-mutual-cause-it-was-just-us-two-on-the-same-bed-without-touching-eachother-masturbation with M like two or three years ago, he asked if I were open to do something like that with him as well, and I said sure, I was like 13 and wayyyyyyyy more horny and unhinged, compared to today, well that will probably be doubted by you, as we advance in this story, but alas
Because of that, I had in mind that he'd probably want to advance to some sexual territory, but I didn't know how far he'd go
Tbh, I was curious (and probably a bit horny) yesterday
But then he started to message my calfs
And that was a bit weird, but I wanted to see where it would go
He, very easily recognizably so, advanced to my thighs
Well, my thigh Ig, cuz it was just my left leg
We were laying on his bed btw
Honestly, I was getting kind of a boner, which subsided again and all that, but yeah, sometime later, I pretended to not notice, by being on my phone, he arrived at the inside of my thigh
He messaged a bit there, honestly didn't feel that bad, told him how I like these uncontrollable muscle contractions that happen in the abdominal area by doing that
Then he went to my pants and touched my dick, at this point being like 30% stiff
He asked " Is it alright if I do that?"
And I said "Yk, sure ig"
Then, for like two mins he layed down on my leg, having it encapsulated at the calf level with both his legs, and had his eyes closed
I kept my eyes closed
But he then, miserably failing to do it swiftly, tried to open up my pants
However, I was wearing a costume including a robe
So he first had to get through there
Then he opened my belt, unbuckeled my pants
It took him like 30 seconds to do this whole stuff T__T
Then started to strocke my dick
I didn't open my eyes
The thing is
At first I was still horny/onboard with it
Even tho that faux pas with being incapable of opening up my pants kinda killed something in me
However, and I genuinely do not know how to be that bad at it, but he fr did it so badly
The thing is, he tried to turn it into this handjob into a blowjob, but failed
As in, he aborted trying to suck my dick
Also, shortly after I briefly opened my eyes
But rapidly closed them again
Cuz mind you, I am not in the slightest interested into this dood sexually, I don't think he's attractive and I find his rhetoric to be highly immoral and wrong
So, like 1 minute in I was already starting to regret giving him consent
The thing is, I really do not know how dood was this bad, but it took him like 10 mins to make me cum
And that was not because of any edge-play he did, but simply because he was so abhorently badddd
after what felt like an eternity I came
But not even in a pleasurable way T_T
Also not in some overstimulated way either
more like in my-body-wanting-it-to-end-way
Almost like I came from exhaustion, lol
I still kept my eyes shut
Now, I don't exactly know what he did next
All I know for certain is that he ingested my cum
And later told me he felt like he had some heartburn from that
After I opened my eyes again, he went to go and wash his hands, his bathroom is next to his bedroom and no-one else was on the same story of the house
I just thought something like " After this disaster, I am fully able to withstand NNN"
Now, I know it's just some stupid internet challenge I attempt for funsies, as I'm well aware there's no health benefit to stopping to masturbate
One could make the argument of it being better to not watch porn, which is ofc 100% right, and I have actually started to actively watch porn when masturbating which is no bueno honestly, but alas, I started attempting NNN at 12, so like around half a year after starting to masturbate and the first year I got to like day two, which was also stupid, cause for the first 2 years, I actually counted edging to not be against the rules, which may be in-line with the online rules, but with my goals and all that, it doesn't even make sense. Year two I got to day three, but lost due to edging and then getting to orgasm by accident. Last yeah, tho, I got to like day 4 sans any edging and I then just gave up, lol
Now, like a few months afterwards, I wanted to see how long I could function without masturbating, and made it nine days
Now, ofc my sex drive is like up and down, being pretty low this summer and, since I was unusualy often sick this yeah, increasing everytime I was sick to like 5-10 times a day
Which for me rn is crazy, but like 2-3 years ago, that was the norm, lol
Anyhow, my goal is first of all completing week one and afterwards I'd just look how long I could go on
Now, usualy, the last like week I probably averaged like 2 times a day, with variance in frequency, but after that abomination of a handjob my sex drive is basically non-existant
Anyhowwww
Afterwards he asked me if anything in our relationship changed, and I just replied; "Nope, absolutely nothing changed"
He also kinda apologized, saying: I probably did everything wrong"
And I just nodded and said "Yeeaahhh"
Then we watched Shameless for like 1.5 hours
Afterwards we talked with his mom for like 15 mins
And then I went home
I told Clara about this
ofc not in this much detail
but she basically concluded, I should've made it clear, I don't really want it, but that it's also hard to do stuff like that in such stressful situations
Also, btw, after like 5 mins I really consider to get up, turn away from him and finish the job myself
Today, there were like a bunch of peeps here, both family and friends of my parents, cuz of my birthday past
and M was here as well
I also told him about this
I was kinda anxious as to how he'd react, but he didn't really concern the fact that we both are notttt compatible at all and how out of the blue something like that is, but also told me similar stuff to C
Also, he told me I really sound petrified when talking about how bad that handjob was, and yeah, I'm still flustered by that, honestly
Also, cuz T is Mormon and all that, he told me, while he did sin, he does not feel any guilt involved with this
And, if he just prays a bit, "god" will forgive his sins
On top, he said, it was good to try stuff once and noticing he didn't really like it
But he also said, he felt like he came, as in like post-nut-clarity and shit, even tho he wasn't even sexually stimulated
From all this he concluded, he is certainly straight, which is a relief for him, cuz his religion is oppressive of LGBTQ+ folks and says they've been possessed by "Satan"
Also, when we were out trick or treating, he told me, I will, very certainly so, contract AIDS cuz I'm, supposedly, gay (I'm bisexual, and told him that way too often, but whatever, at this point, Idec anymore...)
Also, you can't contract AIDS, simply HIV, which only the is able to turn into AIDS once left untreated, but whatever...
So yeahhh
Thank you for coming to my TED-Talk!"
Should there be any grammatical mistakes, I sincerely apologize, but I really didn't want to have to read through this cringeyyy text again, only anonymized the names, I kinda used it to vent Ig.
Soooo, a lof of text isn't relevant for this, I don't think, but once more, didn't really want to have to read through it again. Butttt, I know this situation arose from mutual consent and all that shebang, but I did not like it, as evident in the text. I really do not ever wanna do stuff with that dood again, well sexually that is. As a side-note, he has since also touched me inappropriately again. The thing is, he does it in ways too subtle to call out, or when he does it obviously, I call it out, but I don't think he really cares to stop with this behavior. For example, today, during PE, we were supposed to play volleyball. Instead of this, he wanted to "invent a British sport" I don't remember what he called it, where you shoot the ball with one of these plunger thingies used there to get like removable tiles from the gym's flooring. Nothing out of the ordinary there, where a weird bunch in our circle of peeps. A bit later tho, when we were walking around and fixing the netting and all that, he touched my butt with it, thought of saying something,but didn't, as a few seconds later he touched my shoulder with that thingie. I don't really know what to do here.
Also, with the sexual aspect, I _do_ like sexual shit, and got a bunch of really supportive (and hot, lol) doods, gals, and such around me, from other cities, whom I met at like a
10-day-thingie (turns out were basically just all neurodivergent, lool).
However, there it's all just platonic (mostly, with quite a fair bit of homoerotica and a bit of heteroerotica mixed-in) and alright like that. With that Mormon dood, I feel like, he actually likes me more than reciprocated and in a romantic/sexual way. As he's Mormon, tho he can't really communicate that stuff openly.
Sooooo, how could I confront him about this?
Thankiess :3

[trunky]

Yeah sure, I just copy-pasted it from discord, will do so now.

[trunky]

Heyyy,
so this is basically just a rant I send to a Frenchie I met on Discord like a month ago.
They're queer as well, a trans dood to be exact, however, since they're 29 years of age they didn't feel comfortable talking to me about stuff really, and instead told me about resources I could consort and specifically mentioned Scarleteen. For context, this happened on Halloween and I wrote to them that night. [edit: I changed it up a lil in terms of formatting and made it a bit less graphic + cut out some unnecessary stuff]
Here it goes:
"So… here’s a bit of a story time.

I just turned 15 a few days ago, so I should be in a different head-space or something..

Anyhow, let me just quickly introduce all peeps involved:
M, 14, my best friend, muslim, and a chill dood all things considered
C, 15, that friend [I told you about sometime ago, who ]I'm really good with
T, 14, and that dood that's pretty racist and kinda fascist in his rethoric
I went to his place yesterday cuz of Halloween and since I didn't have anything better to do, + I went to his place like the previous two years with other folks as well. This year, however, we were the only ones His family of like 15-20 peeps, like 10 of them kids from like 6-12 . We were there as well,thoo.
Sooo, I got to his place kinda late well, like quarter to 6 but it started at 4:30, that's why I was kinda late So I just ate a lil bit And then we basically went trick or treating already Not like the both of us really went; we got three whole candies, which were like cheap stale ones as well basically just went with his family, cause, might as well Just chatted a bit.

Now, dood's a Mormon as well, not having been baptized tho, cuz his parents don't really want him to and say, he's only allowed to do it by the time he turns 18, hoping he won't go through with it. I'm kinda indifferent, cuz I view all organized religion as inherently bad and immoral, especially considering the Mormons' image of a bunch of different groups of peeps, but alas, the issue came up I said like; "Well, I feel like, if it weren't for your religion, you wouldn't completely cross out the idea of engaging in homosexual acts" foreshadowing...

And he replied; "No, that's true. I mean like, I couldn't imagine having a husband, but I'd like to try it at least."
I basically went on how that's toxic thinking Anyhow, a bit later I said, in English, cuz why not:
"If "god" made homosexuality a sin, why did he make boys so cute?"
to like look what he had to say.
He said something like " Well, you're not one of them" (the cute ones) I replied, sarcasticly; "Yeah, Idk, thanks ig"
He then said something about how it's still a sin, and the fact I like boys makes me be possesed by Satan, whom he whole-heartedly believes in.
"Well, if I am possesed by Satan and on the "wrong" side, how come I am doing so good in live, by every measure, including mental health-wise?",
I asked He announced, I will loose everything I've got rn one day
Yeahhh, I thought of that to be very weird That wasn't the only stuff we talked about, but the stuff important to the story Right now, I should probably reiterate, how he has, on multiple occasions sexually/verbally harassed me. What comes to mind would be, how, when we were in some large city together, when we were alone in public, but no people being around, in some Japanese park, one build up by the Jap-Ger community, he grabbed my ass I just said something like:
" Wtf, do not do anything like that ever again"

And like a few weeks earlier, after PE, when we and two friends were alone in the changing room for doods, when I changed pants, he said:
" That's quite the nice ass"
And I was like:
"Wtffff, I do not want to hear something like that from you, that's actually verbal harassment, dood"

Soooooooooooooo, to get back on track, we were in his room after getting back from trick or treating And talked about that concert I went to with C on Wednesday. He thinks I want a romantic relationship with her, even tho I've told him multiple times, I was very happy with the platonic one we got rn and how I adore to be able to talk to her about everything concerning me in life, and how that's also the case vise-versa. Btw, the concert was greatttttt and we talked a bunch beforehand and afterwards

Soooo, when we got back to his room, things got weeeeird.
(to not go unnecessarily into detail in this blogpost:)
He basically tried to insinuate foreplay.
He took my socks off, ewww.
Buttt I got a foot massage, so might as well.

Honestly, I kinda wanted to see where this would go, cuz I always thought he had some gay/bi energy in him and due to his harassment, I feel like it might be directed towards me, yuck. Anyhow, in the moment I got kinda curious, at the same time he basically started to slowly move up, first my calfs, up to my thighs. I pretended not to notice. Eventually, he got up to my genitals. Weirdly, he squeezed my penis once. I was kinda caught off-guard, said nothing, after which for like two minutes, he layed on my belly with his head, his feet holding my left foot inside. Afterwards, he touched my dick again and asked:
"Is it alright if I do that?"
And I was like:
"Sure."

Now he tried to open up my pants. Took like 30 seconds, cuz I was wearing like a costume and all that shebang. Already started to cringe a bit on the inside. Well, things were only to go downhill from here. So, cuz I do not want to have to live through this agony in my thoughts again, this was it briefly:
Overall, the worst handjob I think I'll ever receive in my entire life, I don't even know how one can suck at it that much...
Second of all, he tried to turn it into a blowjob shortly after commencing, but failed, in the sense it did not work out.
Also, it took like ten minutes for him to finally make me cum, I actually contemplated just getting up, going to the other side of the bed and finishing it myself..
Honestly, I really felt uncomfortable in the whole "act", if one deems it the dignity to be called that... And the worst thing for me is: Neither do I like his personality, nor his looks, nor his game...

Afterwards he asked me if anything in our relationship changed, and I just replied;
"Nope, absolutely nothing changed"
He also kinda apologized, saying:
I probably did everything wrong"
And I just nodded and said:
"Yeeaahhh"
Then we watched Shameless for like 1.5 hours. Afterwards we talked with his mom for like 15 mins Then I went home I told C about this. She basically concluded, I should've made it clear, I don't really want it, but that it's also hard to do stuff like that in such stressful situations

Also, cuz T is Mormon and all that,
he told me, while he did sin, he does not feel any guilt involved with this.
Also, if he just prays a bit, "god" will forgive his sins.
On top, he said, it was good to try once and noticing he didn't really like it.
But he also said, he felt like he came, as in like post-nut-clarity and shit, even tho he wasn't even sexually stimulated.
From all this he concluded, he is certainly straight, which is a relief for him, cuz his religion is oppressive of LGBTQ+ folks and says they've been possessed by "Satan". Also, when we were out trick or treating, he told me, I will, very certainly so, contract AIDS cuz I'm, supposedly, gay (I'm bisexual, and told him that way too often, but whatever, at this point, Idec anymore...) Also, you can't contract AIDS, simply HIV, which only the is able to turn into AIDS once left untreated, but whatever...

Today, there were like a bunch of peeps here, both family and friends of my parents, cuz of my birthday past and M was here as well.
I also told him about this I was kinda anxious as to how he'd react, but he didn't really concern the fact that we both are notttt compatible at all and how out of the blue something like that is, but also told me similar stuff to C
He also told me I really sound petrified when talking about how bad that handjob was,
and yeah, I'm still flustered by that, honestly..."

Should I have made grammatical mistakes, I sincerely apologize, in theory, English isn't one of my native languages, in practice, it's pretty close...
I know this situation arose from mutual consent and all that shebang, but I did not like it, as evident in the text. I really do not ever wanna do stuff with that dood again, well sexually that is. As a side-note, he has since also touched me inappropriately again. The thing is, he does it in ways too subtle to call out, or when he does it obviously, I call it out, but I don't think he really cares to stop with this behavior. For example, today, during PE, we were supposed to play volleyball. Instead of this, he wanted to "invent a British sport" I don't remember what he called it, where you shoot the ball with one of these plunger thingies used there to get like removable tiles from the gym's flooring. Nothing out of the ordinary there, where a weird bunch in our circle of peeps. A bit later tho, when we were walking around and fixing the netting and all that, he touched my butt with it, thought of saying something, but didn't, as a few seconds later he touched my shoulder with that thingie, I suspect to make it less obvious he touched me..
I don't really know what to do here...

Also, with the sexual aspect, I do like sexual shit, and got a bunch of really supportive (and hot, lol) doods, gals, and such around me, from other cities, whom I met at like a
10-day-thingie (JuniorAkademie, spelt that way, as it's a German language term) {turns out were basically just all [most, not me thoo, lol] neurodivergent, lool}.
However, there it's all just platonic (mostly, with quite a fair bit of homoerotica and a bit of heteroerotica mixed-in) and alright like that.

With that Mormon dood, I feel like, he actually likes me more than reciprocated and in a romantic/sexual way. As he's Mormon, tho he can't really communicate that stuff openly.

Sooooo, how could I confront him about this?
Thankiess :3

[Heather]

Hey there, trunky.

I'm afraid that I find the format you posted this all in -- without any paragraph breaks, with short lines piled on top of each other in a loooooong scroll -- pretty impossible to read, and I'm unlikely to be the only one who has that trouble.

Can I ask you to please edit or report using more standard formatting and grammar, please? We'll be happy to help you, but we need to be able to read what you wrote to do that. Thanks!

[amber]

Hi trunky,

Thanks for separating that original post out! I am glad you found a more appropriate place for the support you are looking for in us.

I am also glad you have some good friends and a support system around you. I am sorry you have had to experience that harassment from T. His religion and beliefs are never excuses for breaking boundaries you have, making you uncomfortable, or not considering your feelings/wants.

How have you been feeling about your friendship with T after everything happened? Correct me if I am wrong, but the way you detail your discomfit and disgust make me believe you are feeling pretty badly. If that is the cause I think you owe it to yourself to question how much time you want to see/interact with T. How would you feel about separating yourself from him?

[trunky]

The thing is, I don't think that's possible, since we got to the same school and have like 70% the same courses + a similar commute, so that's why, even though we're not that close, we still hang out during breaks and talk and such in a most of the time pleasent manner, even though he's like politically really almost opposite to me, and dislikes people on a chauvinistic set of ideals, and some other political stuff I'm not gonna get in to here, all things I absolutely hate about him, (and that disaster of a sexual interaction we had), but overall, he's better than the other like 10 doods from my class, excluding two of my friends + T in that, whom some of have wished death upon me, act like we're a quadrouple/actually all gay (which they also regularly use as an insult), even tho none of us are gay, the two others are straight and with T I don't even know.. and just generally approach us, but especially me (and that's not a victim complex of mine, but affirmed by multiple people in my surroundings) with hatred and just like try to inconvenience us at all times with petty stuff...

[Latha]

Hi there, Trunky

I'm concerned to hear that your classmates are being hateful to you and your friends. It really isn't okay for them to harass you all like this, and this isn't something you should have to manage on your own without support. Do the adults around you know that this is happening? Do you have a sense of how they might respond if you asked for their help?

Given the fact that T and you interact so much and are in an otherwise hostile environment with your peers, I see why isn't isn't possible to easily separate yourself from him. You've mentioned that when his political beliefs and ideals are not brought up, your relationship is mostly pleasant. Is that still true after the sexual interaction you had at his place? What would make being around him tolerable for you? (That is, other than changing his beliefs, which might be a bit difficult.)

[trunky]

First off, yeah, there have been some attempts by for example our P.E. teacher and, mostly they've stopped, but simply lessening the quantity of harassment does not lessen the actual verbal abuse happening here. We've considered talking to them (our teacher) again, but haven't done so yet. My parents have also said to like keep a record, so to speak, of what they're doing, but haven't started doing that either.

The thing is, to be honest, nothing regarding our relationship has changed meaningfully, just that I regret doing that and all. However, he was beforehand and still is, sometimes, stepping over boundaries. With the examples I've brought up beforehand, for example.

Also, which isn't that big of a deal, but dude doesn't seem to really get bisexuality as a concept, I don't feel like. Cuz he's often called me gay, or when others, whom I've never interacted with, as we aren't in the same grade even, in an attempt to antagonize me, asked me whether I'm gay (sometimes worded in articulated ways like "Do you take dick?", "Do you like to suck another man's cock?" and more creative wordings), or not, which I declined as being true, he said to me afterwards, that I actually am gay, because I am attracted to doods™. Which is simply a label I wouldn't use for myself, neither would I straight for that matter, as I much rather use bi or pan.

The thing is, I feel like, no matter how often I tell him, he just willfully ignores it or doesn't "understand" it?
I don't even know, to be honest...

[lilikoi]

Hi trunky,

I'm sorry you're dealing with this harrassment. I do think bringing it up again to the PE teacher is a great idea. It sounds like a general issue with the school culture and there is plenty that they could do to address that. The school probably took a very lenient approach the first time. If your parents are supportive, you could ask them to discuss their concerns with the school as well. I know parents often don't know the entirety of a story. Even if you don't feel comfortable sharing fully, you could let them know that you are being bullied and in general you only feel comfortable with your small group of friends. As a former teacher myself, I want you to know that many schools consider this kind of situation a top priority. Bare minimum, teachers could be checking in with you and your friends to help you all feel comfortable.

As far as ideas for sparking a direct conversation with T, there are plenty of ways to approach it. Are you envisioning an in person conversation between classes? Would you consider having the conversation with him and another person there? You could ask a friend who you trust to be there while you talk it out or ask the PE teacher to hold you two back at the end of class one day so you and T can workshop a better dynamic. To help identify the things you want to say, you might consider a few of these questions: What would an ideal "relationship" between you and T look like considering your history so far? What do you feel when you are interacting with T or when he comes into a space? How would you like to feel instead? What could he do to change the dynamic?

[trunky]

That's a tough one. I'll give it some time to think through.

[maille]

Sounds good, trunky. We'll be here when you are ready.

[trunky]

Look, the thing is, it's weird with dood.
There isn't really anything to tell him, I don't think.
He's still insinuating stuff I don't want, concerning the one night we had something together, or rather, that something similar would be something he'd like.
Now, not with these words, just by being weird to me.
For example, we went and brought friends of ours home, and it just so happened we both had to go to the toilet. These friends only have one toilet currently, due to renovations.
He then literally asked me "Oh, btw, they've only got one toilet rn, should we go to the toilet together?"
And I was like "WHAT? Ew, no! Why would you even consider something like that??"
He responded "A pity..."

And there've been multiple similar situations, not with similar scenarios, but I think you can catch my drift.
So yeah, I don't really know. I feel like, he wants something in our relationship I don't reciprocate and honestly, I think I can't really do anything more than being apathetic to all of this, as talking to him doesn't really prove effective....

[Sofi]

It's unfortunate you have to keep seeing him and he insists on acting like this...not cool. Sometimes being apathetic and simply not engaging can work, indeed. Is that something you've tried with him yet, and if so, how did that go?

[trunky]

Well, I'm just trying to not engage with this "bait", and Idk, didn't really seem to stop this behavior. This "more aggressive" form Ig has only started to happen this month, ie after having our sexual interaction.

[Tara]

Hey, trunky - Like Sofi mentions above, it may take a little more of pulling away from the relationship entirely if he continues doing this, not respecting your boundaries, and it is making you this uncomfortable. You have expressed your feelings and uncomfortability to him, correct?

[trunky]

Well yeah, kinda.
To be honest, I just sternly tell him his behavior is wrong in the moment,
not really going into it after the fact.

[Tara]

You might need to completely distance yourself from him or cut things off if he is not going to listen to you or respect you.

[trunky]

Well, as I talked about in an earlier post, that isn't really possible, as we're in 70% the same courses in school and all that shebang..

[Tara]

Do you need to have law enforcement or other authorities intervene?

[trunky]

Eh, I don't think it's that important either..

Like, it's bereable enough I guess, just the being around him part, that is..

But wouldn't say it'd need to go that far.

[lilikoi]

Aw trunky, I empathize! You deserve to feel respected and heard. This sounds so hard to deal with since distancing yourself any further feels impossible and talking to T isn't working.

I want to be clear that harassment is serious enough that involving authorities would not be taking things too far. Your comfort is important and receiving sexual advances from someone you do not want them from is harassment. It could be a school counselor or a teacher if law enforcement doesn't feel approachable for you.

In terms of what you can do on your own, I think you're doing a great job reinforcing that you do not want a sexual relationship with T when he suggests it. From my point of view, your dynamic could benefit from a clear boundary being made before he makes any comment. I imagine you initiating the conversation before he gets inappropriate by saying something like, "since we're both here together, just a reminder that I do not appreciate the comments you've been making and I have decided that when you say something that makes me feel uncomfortable I will..." and fill in the rest with something that feels possible like "distance myself from you for the rest of the hang" or "ask you to stop harrassing me". Does that feel like something you could do?