Cant put more than one finger in without it hurting

[77vctria]

I am a 17 year old girl, and after a masturbate a few times, I put one finger in and it doesnt feel good and it hurts, then when I try to put another one it hurts a lottt. Im not tense or anxious in that moment, so I dont understand why I cant put more than one. I never use lube since I feel wet enough and never need it. I told my mom id like to go to a gynecologist im pretty shy tho. And im wondering if this wont cause a problem in my future relationships :,(

[Heather]

Hi there 77vctria: welcome to the boards.

If one finger doesn't feel good and hurts, it's not surprising more feels even worse and hurts more.

Chances are good nothing is physically wrong with you, and there's no reason to presume that how this feels suggests you'll have problems with any kind of sex with partners. If you want a gynecologist appointment in general, or to ask about this, that's certainly something you can do, but we can also try and troubleshoot this here first to see if we can't figure out what's going on, if you'd like.

Not using lubricant may well be part of the issue. There's often not really such a thing as "wet enough," because what feels good isn't really about what's "enough" as it is about what feels good. Seeing how things feel with lubricant is probably something smart to try simply because it's usually an easy thing to access, and lubricant is good to have for any kind of genital masturbation even when you're not entering any orifices.

Can you say some more about what you're doing and why you're doing it? Are you trying to insert fingers because fingers actually feel good, or because you're curious, or because you feel like you have to for some reason (like the idea that doing so will do anything when it comes to future sex with partners)? When you're doing this, are you able to have the kind of leverage -- which you may or may not be able to have if you can't reach or have small hands -- to curl your fingers a bit when doing this rather than poking them in like you are pointing at something? Are you only pushing a finger in when you can also feel your vagina kind of pulling in? Are your fingernails short and filed down so nothing is ragged? When you insert a finger, are you already feeling very good from doing other things first, like from masturbation with the external clitoris and the rest of the vulva?

[77vctria]

Hey thanks for the reply, I feel pretty good before putting a finger in, im not stressed or anything I usually try it after a few orgasms. I try it because im curious, and I want to see if it might pleasure me. Also I keep my fingernails short and I think my finger goes pretty far I just dont feel anything good even if I kinda move it and explore inside.

[Heather]

So, let me share a few things that might help, especially if you don't already know them.

The vaginal canal, from the opening to the back, isn't a straight line, but more of a backward c-shape if you were looking at it from the side, with you facing forward. So, if someone is just putting something straight in there without following that curve, it generally won't feel good and can even hurt.

Too, the vaginal canal only really has a lot of sensory nerve endings -- the kind that make us feel things with fine tough, like from a finger -- in the first inch or so from the opening. The rest of the vagina really is only very responsive to the pressure of fullness, when something is inside the whole of it, from the front, and pretty much fills it up, and generally more than just a finger will, especially a finger inserted with the weird angle you only really can when it's your own finger rather than the finger of someone whose arms aren't attached to the body the vagina is part of.

It may also be that if you're putting your finger in deeply, you're poking or moving around your cervix. The cervix -- which starts in the back of the vagina, but during some parts of the menstrual cycle, can be very close to the opening, and feels a little like a dimpled chin at the opening if it -- has quite a lot of sensory nerve endings, so it's pretty easy to poke or prod it in a way that doesn't feel good, is uncomfortable, or even hurts.

It may also be that because you're doing this after a few orgasms, your body is kind of done with the whole thing, and you exploring a part of it that isn't particularly responsive to the way you're trying to engage it doesn't feel good for that reason, too.

Ultimately, exploring vaginal stimulation on your own is something much better accomplished with a toy than with your own fingers, so in a lot of ways, the whole issue could just be that you're using the wrong tool for the job, so to speak.

How does all of that land with you?

[77vctria]

Ohh ok, thanks for the information and explanations! Also I did ask my mom for tampons (never put one before so im curious) and lube !! I will see how it goes and try stuff out and if It still hurts ill go to gynecologist, thank you so much for the help !

[Heather]

You're welcome, I hope they help you out.

I agree that seeing the OB/GYN if you're still having pain makes sense, and know, too, that it's usually always okay to make an appointment with them just to ask any questions that may be relevant to your sexual or reproductive health. We don't have to have something wrong with us to have any kind of health appointment, appointments can usually just be focused on education sometimes if that's what we're seeking. <3