Partner says, that it hurts affter intercourse for a day :(

[Mark__ys]

When me and my partner have intercourse, it starts to hurt, especially when i reinsert and it comes to a point she wants it but dosent because it hurts. After the intercourse it hurts for a day inside of her vagina ( she says like on period just little bit less ), but it all goes away.

My question is how do i prevent this, we have used lube but we usually have great warmup and at start she loves everything.
I was wondering could it be me because i am 7.2 inches (18.4cm) and she likes when i go till as deep as i can to the point i can feel her end...
i just noticed: Got Questions? Get Answers. do i repost there?

[Latha]

Hi there, Mark_ys

No worries, you don't have to repost your answer. Got questions? Get answers is just another forum to make posts--the difference between that and Ask us! (where you've made this post) is that here, you will only receive responses from Scarleteen staff and volunteers, while you can receive responses from us and other users like you there.

I'm sorry to hear that your partner is in pain after sex, and I appreciate that you are here to figure out why it is happening. We can help you think though what you two could try to make sex hurt less for her.

To start, if you are guessing that the depth of intercourse might be an issue, there is a way to test that to know for sure. What would you think of having sex without going that deep once, and seeing how she feels?

Too, if I may ask, would you say a little about the position you are in when it starts to hurt for your partner?

I wonder if it would help us give better advice if we could talk to your partner directly. You are an important part of this conversation, but she probably has more information about how she is feeling during sex and afterwards... Do you think she would be okay with coming online here?

[Mark__ys]

I did ask her, to try to not go all the way but in the moment she likes it so much that she completely forgets what we are trying to do. I have tried the G-spot but she just says that it hurts more because she feels like im pushing her bladder.

Usually we do missionary or doggy because when she is on top i have noticed that she gets tight and a lot more dry ( i cant get in her ), so if she is laying down shes more relaxed and she enjoys it a lot more.

I dont thing that she will come online, because she says its normal for some girls and after intensive intercourse, and i dont want her to know im asking questions about this..

[Heather]

Honestly, it sounds to me that what's most likely is just that you two are overdoing it, and your partner doesn't understand that once any kind of sex starts to hurt, it's time to stop. So, what you'll both just need to do is do other things if and when one kind of sex starts to hurt, and, from the sound of it, things that don't involve her vagina. Maybe that's oral sex with her genitals, maybe it's focusing on your body instead, maybe it's other things -- even just switching to cuddling or some gentler kind of physical intimacy -- but once sex you've been at for a while hurts, it's really important to stop to prevent injury. It's great you two enjoy each other so much, and I get that can make it hard to put the brakes on, but our bodies -- alas -- have limits. Sometimes pain is how we find out what those are!

In other words, she's right, but what she's missing is that continuing to engage in anything that hurts isn't the right move. From here on out, you both just need to stop or switch things up to another activity if and when intercoyrse hurts or doesn't feel good to anyone anymore. <3